Washington, DC- Kurt Fellows (67), is being held by the Secret Service at an undisclosed location after a shipment containing close to 1000 previously used sex toys (dildos) arrived at the Whitehouse addressed to President Biden. The letter attached to the shipment said, “Since you like to fuck all of […]
Los Angeles, CA- Veronica Williams (27) is in Los Angeles County Jail tonight awaiting her arraignment for attempted armed robbery and aggravated assault in the 3rd degree. Veronica was arrested late last night after a call for help came in from a liquor store she had just tried to rob. […]
Humble, TX- Courtney Vanhousen (31), was picked up by Humble Police after a frantic call came in from the school she taught. The caller said that she was performing “sex acts” in front of her students. Ms. Vanhousen has been a Sexual Education teaching for the past 5 years and […]
Sugarland, TX- Chase McKinney (26), is recovering in a Houston based hospital. Chase was the recipient of a horse penis and his surgery was the first time attaching a horse penis onto a human was a success. Chase had what was referred to as a “micro penis”. A micro penis […]
Miami, Florida- A ghostly pale man riding a horse drew attention on the beaches of Miami. A lifeguard thought he’d talk to the man since it was obvious he didn’t spend much time at the beach and wanted to make sure he would be cautious if he went into the […]
Phoenix, AZ- A high school special education teacher, Peter Mulrooney (39) has been arrested after a bevy of his students began to lose sleep and have radical changes in their behavior. All of the students in his class suffer from some sort of mental or physical limitations. Unable to control […]
Paul Teutul Sr. (73) of Orange County Choppers fame, has written a new tell all book “Ride My Hog” about his life and times as king of the 2000’s reality shows and beyond. “They were wild times. Sex parties, booze and more cocaine that Tony Montana ever dreamed of”, writes […]
San Diego, CA – Carson Miller (41), has been a participant in San Diego annual spaghetti cook-off for the last 12 years. In those dozen years, the highest he had placed was 2nd and Carson knew that 2nd place was just the first loser. For 2022 and lucky contest number […]
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