People Are Being Admitted To The ER At An Alarming Rate With This Penis Shaped Wine Bottle Wedged Up Their Rectums

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Los Angeles, CA- A disturbing trend is taking place at emergency rooms across America. An alcoholic beverage company called, “Just The Tipsy” markets penis shaped wines bottles to women looking to make a splash at a bachelorette party or to show off their sense of humor at a company party. While the sophomoric attempt at humor is cute, many are finding out just how dangerous these penis shaped bottles are.

A closer look at the penis shaped bottle.

This year over 100 people have admitted to Ronald Reagan UCLA Medical Center with one of these bottles stuck up their anus. “Selling an alcoholic beverage in a bottle that resembles a phallus is tantamount to depraved indifference. It doesn’t take an educated person to see how this is a disaster in progress”, Dr. Fredrick Penberthy of Ronald Reagan UCLA Medical Center.

As of now only 5 bottles have broken inside the anus’s of patients resulting in 4 deaths. The Food and Drug Administration is expected to step in and take a closer look at Just The Tipsy in the coming weeks. So if you plan on getting a bottle to be the talk of the next party, you better hurry up and get one while they’re still on the shelf.

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