Butte, MT- Leander Gomes loves beef jerky. Let that not be an understatement, beef jerky was served as part of dinner at his wedding. He loves jerky! But with the rising costs of Beef, Leander was gonna have to figure out another way to feed his desires. “I couldn’t afford my beloved Jack Links no more”, he said.
Leander came up with the idea at work one night. He is a part time cremator at the local crematory. One night while a body was developing a nice char, Leander became aroused by the sweet smells and crackle of the fats. “This would make a good jerky”, he thought. So from that night on Leander would take a leg or an arm with him each time he would cremate a body to stock up on good meat. “I would stuff whatever parts I took in my bag and take it home to my deep freezers. Now I had the meat but I didn’t know nothing bout making jerky with it. That’s when I learned about Shep’s Notes”.
Shep Arnold had famously been arrested for selling human beef jerky, but his recipe’s have never been made public. Leander went to visit him in prison and Shep gave him the location of his notes which contained his famous human jerky recipe. “Sometimes when a criminal has been imprisoned, they will tell their secrets to a copy cat to have their nature of crimes live on”, said Special Agent In Charge Heathclifford Moggins. “Shep will enjoy watching Leander carry on his work”.
With recipe in tow, Leander started to produce some fine quality jerky. “Man I had all kinds of jerky piling up. So much so that I decided to share it with the public. That was the mistake that did me in”, said Gomes. A detective from the Arnold case purchased several pounds of jerky from Leander and as soon as he took his first bite, he knew he was tasting Shep’s recipe, “This was the same jerky as before. I remember from my case studies. Damn it’s good”, said Detective Adarundak.
And with that Leander has been placed under arrest for conspiring to sell human flesh to the public along with a laundry list of other charges. It’s looking like he and Shep will get to know each other real well in prison. The families of potential victims are waiting for DNA test results to find out if their loved ones became jerky.
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